Nonna was an HBIC

You read that right my Great-Grandma was the Head-Bitch-in-Charge. She lived to be 101 years old, and wore leopard print and heels to the very end. The picture to the right is her at her ONE HUNDREDTH birthday wearing a gold chain worthy of Ice T.

I like to think that I am a lot like her. Similar taste in fashion, great cooks, family-oriented and spicy. Yes, if Non was anything it was spicy. Here are a few stories of Great-Grandma Grassi, for no reason other than I like to tell them. Some are long, some are short, but all of them show what an incredible woman she was...

• Nonna was born in 1906 in Avezzano, Italy (tiny little village), and when she was only a few years old there was a horrible earthquake in which their house collapsed on top of her and her entire family who were all sleeping in the same bed at the time. Her parents died, but Non and her sister survived for THREE days until someone was able to rescue them. I can't go three days without my Blackberry let alone food and water. Sidenote to this story: This is the same region that was hit with that devastating earthquake last year and my thoughts and prayers are still with the families effected by that quake.
• After the earthquake she was sent to live in an orphanage. She decided she didn't like it there, but she more or less needed to get kicked out to be able to leave. So what does she do? She poisoned the pig. I don't know how or with what, but she must have been resourceful.
• This is by far my favorite story about Nonna, and the best part about it is that she had to have already been 80-something when it happened. So, Non decided that she wanted to buy a gift for my cousin John Paul for his birthday, and being the rebel that she was she planned on taking the bus downtown, by herself, and without telling anyone, to do this. She gets downtown fine and buys her gift. As she is getting back on the bus to come home this man comes up behind her and tries to grab her coin purse. Now, Non was about 4'11" and maybe 90lbs soaking wet so she had to have given it up right? Not a chance. She holds onto the purse and starts yelling at him "You sumova-beech! Getta job! You lazy sumova-beech" (for those who don't speak "old-italian-lady-broken-english" that means "You son of a bitch! Get a job! You lazy son of a bitch!"). Next thing you know the guy gets this terrified look on his face and runs away. Nonna sits down on the bus feeling pretty proud, and goes home.

A few months later...

Papa J is at the store and he runs into an old friend that he used to pour concrete with. Mr. Concrete says "You know, I saw your Grandma downtown a few months ago, is she okay?" My Daddy had no idea what he was talking about so Mr. Concrete elaborates "Yea, me and my guys were patching the road downtown and we see your Grandma getting mugged at the bus stop so we grabbed our shovels, hammers, whatever and started chasing him." So, later Papa J asked Nonna what had happened as she said "That sumova-beech tried to take-a my money. I tell him he lazy and getta job! I scare him good, Michael, he ran away. Try to take-a my money? Sumova beech." Daddy never did have the heart to tell her that it wasn't really her that scared the sumova-beech.